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Author Archives: Woodloaf

September 10, 2015 · Woodloaf

AGTLR 33: Labor Day

Jason and Amy justify the continuing 10 dollar a month hosting fee of AGTLR.com by posting their second episode of the year! We talk about our worst jobs ever!

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod333.mp3

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March 9, 2015 · Woodloaf

AGTLR 32 or 33: The one with two dog stories

This one has two dog stories: One a poignant illustration of difficult choices, and the other about some dumb dog who ran away and thought it would be a swell idea.

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod33.mp3

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June 25, 2014 · Woodloaf

AGTLR 31: Fuck summer.

The AGTLR gang (Jason Amy and Tigger) are back with special guest: Jason’s Wife! (Also known as Amanda). Jason and Amy celebrate the show’s 1 year anniversary (but it isn’t actually). Amy becomes a nurse. Our grandma dies. And Jason tells horrible jokes.

EnJoY!

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod31.mp3

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April 20, 2014 · Woodloaf

AGTLR 30: 30th Anniversary Apathyganza

Amy and Jason… Ok, it’s been a while since I posted. I don’t remember what we talked about. I don’t want to ruin it for you guys (or maybe… I’m 2 lazy?), so the note section will be donated to a picture of a majestic egret.

Snowy-Egret-8

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod30.mp3

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March 27, 2014 · Woodloaf

AGTLR 29: Dad Retires!

Me and Amy drive home from Dad’s retirement party and dish on the ceremony. Also, you can hear my dad’s boss(es) laud him with well deserved praise!

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod29.mp3

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photo (1)

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March 13, 2014 · Woodloaf

AGTLR 28: Another TB Test

 

 

 

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod28.mp3

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The show starts with Amy revealing that she has to get more TB tests (and not because she drinks cow blood).  We discuss our super talented friend Brenna’s (https://www.facebook.com/LottieHop) awesome handicraft (below)!  Finally, Amy talks about the best Illuminati prank ever.

1656104_627760563968828_1966490886_n

 

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February 19, 2014 · Woodloaf

AGTLR 27: Piece of shit car

Amy and Jason discuss how shitty their cars are. Also, we discuss the dangers of hypnotism and other things.

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod27.mp3

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and here’s a frog wrestler guy

 

Burble

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February 8, 2014 · Woodloaf

AGTLR 26: Cookie Butter and the Gully

Me and Amy discuss her harrowing visit to a clinic where hygiene is optional, and the legend of the guy who flipped people off by a Mexican restaurant in Selma. Also, Amy and I eat Cookie Butter and we discuss the  foul gully we’re neighbors with.

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod26.mp3

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IMG_0078

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February 1, 2014 · Woodloaf

AGTLR 25: Coolifornia

In this episode, I tell Amy about my heroic confrontation with a homeless pervert, my idea for a project about our home state of California, and offend Amy with my egregious use of the C word.

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod25.mp3

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I think other things happen also!

 

 

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January 18, 2014 · Woodloaf

AGTLR 24: He Eats Yellowjackets.

I start the podcast by telling Amy about my weird dream. Then we talk about other things. And then we find this awesome bag of old paperwork and it makes for great fodder. I find this weird little pamphlet from the ’70s about my gestation. If I’d read it as a fetus, I’d have made more of an effort to absorb more selenium in the womb, Sigh.

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod24.mp3

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70s1
70s2
70s3

I would have been named Alison if not for my junk.
I would have been named Alison if not for my junk.
GG1
GG2

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January 10, 2014 · Woodloaf

AGTLR 23: Juggalb

Amy starts drawing a picture of a disfigured individual, which can be seen below.

 

Also, we talk about how frightening Juggalos are, and whether or not they qualify as a gang. If you’re afraid to talk about a group of people, what does that make them?

 

Lastly, we play a game of Voices.

 

YOINK.

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod23.mp3

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babyhead

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December 31, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGTLR 22: SAD CHRISTMAS

It’s a special AGTLR featuring me and Amy’s spouses. We play a game of Lightning Tableaus – Tulsamugs.com (go to the site to play along!) edition. Me and Amy sacrifice the dignity of people’s arrest photos and make up stories about how they lost their virginity to footballs and stuff.

It’s an AGTLR Christmas for all to enjoy!

santa

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod22.mp3

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December 19, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGTLR 21: Della Can’t Pee

 

 

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod21.mp3

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It’s almost Christmas, and I’m stuck with the Obamacare night shift at work. Amy shares Justin’s greatest culinary achievement, and we remember one of mom’s greatest faux pas.

Also, Amy describes a hilarious new show in a game that I didn’t prepare for.

IMG_0111

Here’s the rude form letter email Amy got from Roaman’s

email

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December 10, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGTLR 20: Volcano Snowman Jazzy

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod20.mp3

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Amy and Jason get on the subject of depressing holiday parties, the emasculation of the holidays, and celebrity scents.

And cemeteries.

And binoculars.

LOOK! DEAD PEEPS!

LOOK! DEAD PEEPS!

Best Scent!
Which celebrity has the best scent?
View Results
Total Answers 2
Total Votes 2
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November 14, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGTLR 17: Diets can suck a dick

Diets can suck a dick, especially since me and Amy decide to go on one. Fuck diets. They suck with the raging intensity of two dozen chihuahuas.

Also, my favorite band was playing this podunk town for 10 bucks and I missed it because I am insufferably lazy.

 

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod17.mp3

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November 5, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGTLR 16: Patheti-Sad 1st Dates

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod16.mp3

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Me and Amy talk about our embarrassing, traumatic first dates. I think mine was way worse. Also, we talk about our first dates with our spouses. Those are way less embarrassing.

Also, pictures of Poppy and Tigger. Yay!

 

Tigger
Tigger
I can't rotate this picture of Poppy so crane your neck and shut up
I can’t rotate this picture of Poppy so crane your neck and shut up
Tigger and Poppy
Tigger and Poppy

 

Poppy and Tigger

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October 31, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGLTR 15: Frontrubs > Backrubs

Amy and Jason discuss their week… and yes, urine makes a cameo. Brown urine, in fact. Later, Amy and Jason discuss their thoughts on backrubs. Amy then coats herself in sebaceous goo.

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod15.mp3

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October 22, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGTLR Ep. 14: Hi, I’m Buckwhite.

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod14.mp3

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Yep. I give it up. My most horrible secret is out. I was Eddie Murphy’s “Buckwheat” for Halloween. Not recently, though.

We talk about our childhood halloween experiences, including how fucking racist and backwards Kingsburg was in the late 80’s.

Also, shitty snack cakes pre-bitten by a surly douche bear.

This hasn't been stolen yet. Message me for the address.
This hasn’t been stolen yet. Message me for the address.
He used to be funny.
He used to be funny.
Snack cakes this bear used to lure his young victims to their doom.
Snack cakes this bear used to lure his young victims to their doom.

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October 17, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGTLR: The lost episode (crappy quality)

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/podfirst.mp3

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People. People. Here it is. The TRUE first episode of AGTLR. While the quality is TURRIBLE, the content is great! Well, I’m assuming it is. Because I’m in it.

So listen to it! Or don’t SERIOUSLY GO EAT A DICK.

Thanks for listening!

 

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October 8, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGTLR Ep. 12: Normal Happy Family

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod13.mp3

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In this episode, we talk about broken digits, ripped out toenails and funnel cakes.  Also, we talk about dieting and how much better it is to not diet.

And this picture

IMG_7042

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October 1, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGTLR Ep. 11: Pissin’

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod12.mp3

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Amy and Jason regale us with stories from grade school which all happen to center on human waste. Later, they discuss phobias and share random stories that were in their phone’s notes.

l_94fd26c33f96bb0f044e630c63a0a9f7

 

 

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September 21, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGTLR Ep.10: MANY topics (including the extensive discussion of sports)

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod11.mp3

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Justin (Amy’s hubby) is BACK and we discuss MANY topics! Amy and I discover that we both love Empire of the Sun! We bond and it gets uncomfortable.

Also, we participate in a discussion of the many interesting aspects of the following topics:

Fashion

Politics

and

sports

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September 17, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGTLR Ep.9: It’s a Van Dyke

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod10.mp3

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In this episode, we welcome our first guest to majestic Studio D. Amy’s husband Justin drops by to add a dash of spicy Latin flair to our discussions, for you see, he is half Mexican. Topics include Voices, shitheads of the freeway and Van Dyke facial hair

(This isn’t Justin)

Anthony Van Dyck

Anthony Van Dyck

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September 4, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGTLR Ep.8: La Leche League

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod9.mp3

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Join Amy and Jason as they discuss dreams, brainworms and oppressive breastfeeding lecturers.

AND TOP SECRET GOOGLE L*** PROJECT

IMG_0888

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August 28, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGTLR Ep.7: Smooth Jazzerton

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod8.mp3

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In this episode we discuss getting burnt on a Nintendo transaction, a cynical caterpillar and dreams. DREAMS. The weird ones.

 

AND AMY WINS A TROPHY FOR JUST SHOWING UP

photo

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August 21, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGTLR Ep.6: Stomping Grounds

Amy and Jason take a journey down the backroads of Kingsburg. Things take a strange turn when they get lost and lose contact with their family and end up starting a new life as carnies. Or maybe not.

 

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod7.mp3

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August 13, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGTLR Ep.5: TO TO TO A FALLACY AND JESUS COMES TODAY

 

 

 

 

In this episode, I explain the reason the episodes are out of order since Amy was such a venomous harpy about it.  Jeez Amy, chill the fuck out. We also invite a special guest: Tigger, my mom’s cat who stowed away and listened to us. Amy tells us about her horrible job, including sad religious hymns that bring comfort to the olds. Additionally, I sing the ORIGINAL lyrics to The Beverly Hillbillies! It’s fucked up!

TO TO TO A FALLACY AND JESUS COMES TODAY

IMG_0024[1]

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod6.mp3

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August 6, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGLTR Ep.4: Time for voices!

Amy and Jason discuss their favorite topic: TOPICS! Indulge in coffee talk, character voices and other things! Laugh if you wish!

 

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod5.mp3

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July 30, 2013 · Woodloaf

AGTLR Ep.3: Live from a Supermarket!

Me and Amy wander the aisles of a grocery store I used to work at. Nothing has changed. No really – not even the milk! It was a truly awful place and I’m glad I moved on. Enjoy the podcast as we skewer all the lame and bizzare stuff we see.

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod4.mp3

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Wall of Shame
Wall of Shame
Gumballs from the '70s
Gumballs from the ’70s
image_3

image_4
Cart o' Values
Cart o’ Values
Raw sausage and desserts
Raw sausage and desserts

Bone yer own
Bone yer own
We used to make capes out of this stuff
We used to make capes out of this stuff
Can' Juices
Can’ Juices

Wall o' Impulse Buys
Wall o’ Impulse Buys
Kinky
Kinky
Kinky
Kinky

Reinforce those gender roles
Reinforce those gender roles
Um...
Um…
I didn't agree to this!
I didn’t agree to this!

BABY NEEDS DRUGS
BABY NEEDS DRUGS
Don't worry assholes, your shit is safe.
Don’t worry assholes, your shit is safe.
Chicken floating in an opaque liquid
Chicken floating in an opaque liquid

GO 00!
GO 00!
Fancy
Fancy
Fancier
Fancier

image_34
image_35
image_36

image_37
image_40
image_41

image_44
image_45
image_47

image_48
image_50
Aisle of Mystery
Aisle of Mystery

Nutsack fruit
Nutsack fruit
Totally fresh, guys
Totally fresh, guys
image_54

Appropriate
Appropriate
Poor cashier :((
Poor cashier :((
image_64

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July 23, 2013 · Woodloaf

A Guide to Lasting Rivalry ep. 2

Amy shows me a woman giving birth and I throw up on her. There is rap related to copy toner. Later, I pretend to be Dr. Oz and give out potentially harmful medical advice.064

http://www.agtlr.com/wp-content/podcast/pod3.mp3

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